Family Reunion

Everyone would be there;
so, I decided to skip that year,
skip the half-baked cod
Aunt Bert brings,
skip the triplets,
especially the one 
with the left eye that turns
out; never knew which way
she was looking.
It was 1982. E.T. phoned home.
“I Love Rock and Roll” played
on the radio no less than ten
times a day. Aqua Net, a beauty
staple. But I just couldn’t do it.
Couldn’t watch Uncle Harvey
pick his nose or his third wife,
Nancy, pick through his hair
like a monkey looking for fleas.
So, I went to the Over Easy Café
instead—no picking going on there.
The bacon was crisp to perfection,
sourdough bread golden toasted,
lettuce, tomatoes, & creamy mayo
miles away from that God-awful
plum pudding Gertrude always made.
She wasn’t even in our family!
Man, that was a helluva good year 
for marvelous mental health.